Daily Rituals for Mama Wellness
Oh, mama. You have spent countless hours devising nourishing, loving rituals and routines for your family. I know you have perfected that bedtime routine. I know you take great care with those lunches. All those toddler-friendly, wholesome family dinners when you’d rather be wolfing down leftovers watching cooking shows? I see you. You know the importance of being that warm and reliable presence for your kids.
But how much time have you spent creating those routines and rituals for yourself? Those daily touchstones that create so much safety for your kids also keep you grounded. And they don’t require a lot of planning, money, or effort. While there is no one strategy that works for all people, I offer you the following suggestions for creating daily rituals that nourish your wellbeing:
Wake before your kids. Wake up before anyone wakes you up and spend some time alone. Breathe. Meditate. Stretch. Journal. Drink tea or coffee. Read your horoscope. Plan your day. Sit in quiet. Dance to music. Set intentions. All options are on the table. This time can be used for whatever fills your cup and helps put your mind into the ideal headspace to begin your day.
Have a sensory-indulgent transition ritual at the end of the day. Put on your nice sweatsuit, light a candle, play some jazz… Create a sensory connection with the feeling of coming home or saying goodnight to the day. If you work, it’s very helpful to do this at the end of the workday and before diving into the dinner making, homework, bedtime tasks. If you don’t work, it might feel more satisfying to do this at the end of the day when the children are in bed. But if you’re like me - and you fall asleep the minute the kids are asleep - then it may help do this after dinner, when the kitchen is cleaned up, but before undertaking bedtimes. You have to figure out when it’s most helpful to signal to your body that the heavy lifting of the day is done. Over time, just the small/feel/sounds of your ritual cues will create a sense of relaxation in your body and mind.
Dial in your bedtime routine. And I mean for YOU. Soft and comfortable pajamas, soothing skincare, a great book… create an routine you look forward to. For me, the evening routine is skincare (including a face massage on a night when I have more time,) flossing & brushing, looking to the day ahead and writing out my schedule and to-dos, journaling about the day behind me, identifying 3 things I’m grateful for, reading a good book, and listening to a meditation on Insight Timer as I fall asleep. Sounds like a lot when I write it out like that! But I will tell you that I look forward to this routine and miss it when we have events come up (or even if I just have a glass or two of wine and don’t feel as connected to myself as I undertake these steps) and don’t indulge the full routine. It’s hard to put into words exactly what it offers, but it helps me feel like I am consciously setting aside the day to create mental space for rest. This helps me wake feeling prepared for the next day.
Consider a wake-up or bedtime gratitude practice. Before I open my eyes, while I’m still laying in bed, I think of 3 things I’m grateful for. This takes less than a minute, but it really starts my day the right way. I highly recommend it, or something similar, such as setting and intention for the day. Other people have told me they enjoy listing 3-5 things they’re grateful for as they reflect on their day while before going to sleep at night.
Journal your dreams. I like to journal my dreams in the morning. Often, during my morning pages. If you aren’t familiar with The Artist’s Way and the morning pages, do yourself a favor and take the time to learn more. Our dreams help illuminate themes and brilliant, creative ideas that aren’t readily available to our conscious awareness. This can be a playful, creative, and deeply self-connecting way to begin the day.
Stop and smell some rosemary. Or lavender. Or peppermint. You choose the fragrance. Have a nicely scented candle, essential oil diffuser, luxuriously scented hand lotion or something with a scent you enjoy (perfume, lip gloss, a scarf you’ve sprayed, etc.) on hand to enjoy during the day. And actually take 30 seconds and enjoy it. It may help to set a reminder on your phone as you build this habit. The act of stopping and engaging the senses (you could also look outside at the trees, take a walk, give yourself a neck massage, listen to music) helps draw us out of minds and back into our bodies and spiritual homes. Reconnecting with ourselves in this way starts to become highly rewarding and enjoyable and, eventually, no phone reminders are needed.
May these simple ideas inspire you as you create a daily routine that nourishes you, mama. I’ll keep adding as I learn of more - feel free to comment with your own suggestions!
