Why We Homeschool

Let me start by saying that we are adamantly pro-school. Public school. Private school. All the schools. We are fans. I had excellent school experiences growing up and had every intention of sending my children to school, just like everyone else. For years, I happily relinquished the task of educating my children to the (wonderful) nearby schools and focused on my own work.

It was never easy. Being separated from my oldest daughter when she began daycare at 5 months old was physically painful. I can recall in visceral detail how it felt, rushing as quickly as I could from school to pick her up every day. The need to reunite with her felt urgent, all-consuming. This continued even as she entered kindergarten and primary school. It was a bit easier sending my twins to preschool, in large part because their double demands often overwhelmed me. I ached for them when we were apart, like I had with my oldest, but it was also a relief to hand them off.

Since we became a family of 5 and I returned to work, I’ve always felt that we were juggling a few too many balls. Each day was a new schedule to tackle. When kids were sick, the struggle to cancel and reschedule a day of work was frustrating, even overwhelming at times. But we carried on, thinking “this is what people do.” And we considered ourselves lucky to have great schools nearby and jobs flexible enough to accommodate sick days.

But one winter day, when everyone was in a funk, and our oldest daughter was begging to stay home from school for the 20th time, and the house was littered with toys, and we were bickering about the cost and feasibility of taking a trip somewhere warm and sunny, we just decided we couldn’t keep doing it. Or rather, we decided that we didn’t want to.

We had the American dream - a beautiful house, successful careers, yearly vacations, a camper - but it wasn’t our dream. It was a hustle. A grind. A daily hurry-up-and-go in a direction we never consciously chose. Though we’d had plenty of discussions about our values and goals, we never followed through by making financial and lifestyle choices that reflected them. We just continued to do what everyone else did, thinking that was the best way to ensure security and happiness for our children.

So, we sat down and brainstormed. We considered everything from downsizing our home, moving to Italy and opening a B&B (honestly I’m still voting for this option,) switching careers, buying a small farm in Hawaii and homesteading … we covered a lot of ground. All options sounded more appealing than what we were doing. But, logistically, most options were daunting. We tried to prioritize the options that would: 1) Increase the time and mental energy available for connecting as a family, 2) Decrease the sense of busyness in our daily routine, 3) Increase our flexibility and time for adventures and opportunities to learn about other places, languages, and cultures, and 4) Realign our lifestyles with our priorities and values.

It wasn’t the sexiest solution, but we landed on homeschooling. AND working on Italian citizenship by descent in order to keep another option on the table, should we need it, down the road. Homeschooling felt right because it offered more time with kids, more opportunities to focus our learning time on the topics and activities we care about, more flexibility and freedom for our family, and hopefully a slowed-down pace based on our needs, rather than the needs of the school system. We are starting with our oldest daughter and we’ll see what suits the two little ones when the time comes to make the next round of decisions. This gives me time to get my feet wet as a teacher and dial in some home learning systems before attempting to educate the whole, rowdy crew. I’m glad you’re here to learn alongside me as we undertake this new, exciting adventure!

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